Reality Sinks In
by Clana Fan160
Summary: Sequel to NOTHING LEft. What else can life throw at our hero. Clark must deal with a difficult decision that will result in the loss someone he loves and restoring his powers in this adventure. CLANA.
1. Phone Time

Reality Sinks In-Part One

Notes: I'm really happy with how the first part turned out. I hope the second will be a good story that you all like to read. In case you missed my first part it is entitled Nothing Left and can be located by clicking on my link on the top of the chapter. The first chapter starts in the middle of their junior summer and Lana is still in Paris. So enjoy!

Clark walked up the stairs of the loft after a long day of chores and laid down on the couch. He didn't even realize it was Sunday and it was a minute to nine. When the clock hit nine the phone rang.

Clark: Hello.

Lana: Hey You.

Clark: Oh, hi. How are you?

Lana: I'm good. I got an A on my last sketch and the weather is really great here. How's home?

Clark: It's good. It's being really . . .hot lately. Chloe is in Metropolis with her cousin, Lois. She's busy stalking the Daily Planet editor and going to Met U frat parties and getting toasted.

Lana: Sounds like she's having a good time. So . . .what have you been up to?

Clark I've been hanging around the farm a lot, doing chores. I pretty much work, walk around and I've gone to Metropolis a few times to visit Chloe.

Lana: Has your speed come back?

Clark No, I drove. It's a lot slower but it works.

Lana: I'm sure it'll come back sometime.

Clark: I'm not really worried about it. It's kind of refreshing to act normal and it's easier not having the hero complex all the time. I can act like a regular Joe.

Lana: You should feel normal for a change. You've done so much for other people with your abilities you deserve a break. . . .So other than that there are no big things going on at home?

Clark: Not really. Are you having a blast in Paris?

Lana: Yeah. It's amazing here. The museums are amazing and the food is great. Plus, I found this great cappuccino place that I go to everyday now. My apartment's fridge is so full from left overs from these great places.

Clark: Meet any hot french . . . . .

Lana: Clark, you ask me that every time we talk. No I have not met any hot guys.

Clark: I was going to say girls.

Lana :Ooh you're smooth.

Clark : Why thank-you.

Lana: . . .I miss you.

Clark: I miss you too.

Lana: Really?

Clark: Yeah. Who would think a place like Smallville could get boring?

Lana: Obviously people who've never lived there.

Clark: They don't know what they're missing.

Lana: So have you decided if you're going to tryout for the football team this year like you've talked about?

Clark: You know my dad won't approve for all those reasons.

Lana: You don't even have your abilities back yet and you're still strong and healthy. You should do what you want. Plus, it could get you to college for almost no money.

Clark: I don't know what I'll do. My dad will say if I get good grades then I can get a good academic scholarship instead of an athletic scholarship.

Lana: Where do you think you want to go?

Clark: Another question I don't know the answer to. Pete and Chloe are applying to Met U so that might be a good idea.

Lana: Well it'd be nice to have the gang together. . . .Alright, we'll have to finish this conversation next time because I have an early class tomorrow so I need to do my homework and get to bed.

Clark: Okay you overachiever.

Lana: That's me.

Clark: Love you.

Lana: Love you too.

Clark: Goodnight.

Lana: Goodnight Clark..

Clark hung up the phone and put his hands over his face. Every time he hung up the phone after talking to Lana, he felt like the wind was getting knocked of him. He missed her more after every conversation. The only way to lessen his pain was to sleep and dream about her. He got up to go back to the house to go to bed and he spotted a book on the table. It was a scrapbook that Lana had sent him from Paris. It had about a hundred photos of them together, photos of Lana, and photos of Pete, Chloe, Lana, and himself. Reading this before bed made him feel much better. He'd just have to bide his time until she came home.


	2. Missed Calls

Reality Sinks In-Part Two

Notes: This chapter is set when it's still summer and it's a couple weeks after the first chapter. I hope you enjoy and as always reviews are always appreciated.

Lana sat on a bench in Paris with her phone on her ear as she listened to the ringing go into Clark's answering machine yet again. She shut her cell in frustration. Clark had missed three call dates and had not called her back. She needed to know what was going on so she opened the phone and called Chloe's cell. Chloe answered her cell and was in a noisy place so she was put on hold while she went outside.

Lana: Hey where are you at?

Chloe: I'm at the hospital, where else?

Lana: Why are you at the hospital?

Chloe: Haven't you talked to Clark lately?

Lana: No, that's why I called. He hasn't been returning my calls. What's going on?

Chloe: Mr. Kent had a heart attack.

Lana: Oh my God.

Chloe: He's slipped into a coma. He's hooked to a machine that makes him breathe like Darth Vader and they're saying he can't breathe on his own. The doctors don't think he'll ever come out of it. Clark hasn't left the hospital for over a week except to shower and change clothes and then he comes right back. I don't even think he's slept at all.

Lana: I can't believe he didn't call me.

Chloe: Well he's so tired and so sad and worried. He refuses to go home and sleep and he barely eats. I don't know how long it'll be before he gets sick.

Lana: How's his mom?

Chloe: She's distraught. She doesn't know what to do. Jonathon's lawyer is coming to talk to them in two days about something important and that has her really worried.

Lana: I'll be on the first plane out of here.

Chloe: Can you just leave like that? Don't you have classes and stuff?

Lana: Classes can wait. I need to be home right now. Will you pick me up when I get to the airport?

Chloe: Of course.

Lana: Don't tell Clark I'm coming yet okay.

Chloe: Alright. Call me when you're plane is going to land. Be safe Lana.

Lana: I will. Give Clark a hug for me.

Chloe: Will do. Bye Lana.

Lana: Bye.

Lana got up from the bench and power walked to her apartment. She pulled her suitcase from the top of her closet and opened her drawer and dumped all her clothes inside. There was no time to waste. Clark needed her and she hated that she had to wait all the time she was going to have to wait to be with him during all this bad stuff. She called a taxi and had it drive her to the airport as quickly as possible. When purchasing her ticket, the first flight out only had first class so she had to almost max out one of her credit cards to get it. As she waited to get on her plane she thought that clock had slowed down as she just stared at it. She couldn't believe that Mr. Kent had a heart attack. From what Chloe said Mr. Kent was not that well off and it didn't sound good for him. Clark would be devastated if he lost his father. Plus, he'd have to run the farm by himself and take care of his mother. She knew that meant he wouldn't go away to college and his life would be rocked. She just thought how much he didn't deserve this to happen. She made a decision right then and there. If Mr. Kent didn't survive this, then she would stay in Smallville with Clark and not return to Paris or her art school.

Short I know, but many long emotional chapters to come. I promise.


	3. A Surprise Arrival

Reality Sinks In- Part Three

Notes: I know the first two chapters were both fairly short, but starting with this one they will be much longer. This chapter starts as Lana is arriving in Metropolis, so it's about a day since the last chapter. I hope this pushes an emotional rip cord which means I wrote it right. Keep those great reviews coming.

Chloe stood outside the Metropolis Airport looking on the time schedule, making sure Lana's flight was on time. Lana had called and said she'd meet her right in front of a big sign that read: WELCOME TO KANSAS. Chloe started seeing a mass of people coming around the corner when she spotted a young woman that looked like Lana, but a mature Lana who'd aged three years. Chloe blinked as she saw her coming toward her. She looked completely different. Lana was wearing a black halter top, dark denim jeans, a black jacket, dark make up, and her hair up in a messy bun. Lana reached Chloe and wrapped her arms around her. "Oh God, it's so good to see

you,"Lana greeted her as they parted. "You look amazing,"Chloe stood looking Lana up and down. "A lot of things are different in Paris. It makes you grow up a little faster than the slow pace of Smallville. Let's get going. We can catch up on the way to the hospital,"Lana said in a hurry to see Clark. She was still in shock that she'd be seeing him within minutes at the Metropolis hospital. Granted the circumstances were awful, but nothing could make her forget how much she missed him in Paris.

When they arrived at the hospital, her nervousness enlarged with every step. As they rounded the corner to Mr. Kent's room she saw him through the window. Him and his mom were sitting with their backs to the window talking to two doctors. She looked over and saw the lifeless looking body of Mr. Kent. Her hand went up to her mouth as she looked at all the tubes and wires and a wave of fear went over her. She just watched Clark talking to the doctors and even though she couldn't hear, he looked like he was getting angry.

Inside the room- Starting about two minutes before Lana arrived.

"Martha, Clark, it's very hard to say what I'm about to say but I have to say it as Jonathon's physician. I want you to understand I'm trying to look out for his best interest while your thoughts may be slightly clouded with your own wants and needs. Dr. Brookes here and I have discussed and reviewed the facts and it's impossible that Jonathon will ever be 'alive' again. Even if he were to start breathing on his own again, which is highly unlikely, he'll never wake up again. Right now he's sort of stuck between dead and alive because that machine over there is keeping him like that,"Dr Hart said as Martha hung her head, "I'm telling you this because you will not prolong his life by keeping him on that machine. What you will do is drain your money and come back everyday to someone who is gone already and suffer. We've spoken to the lawyer coming tomorrow who'll deliver your husband's wishes and we are obligated to tell you that he's a lost cause no matter what we do for him." Clark just looked down at his hands trying to calm himself down before saying anything to this doctors. His anger began to get the better of him and he began to shake his head. He looked up and suddenly realized it was go time, "How do you know he's a lost cause? Huh? Where's your proof? Do you know everything?"Clark said. "Clark, don't,"Martha pleaded. "No, wait. You're telling me to give up and pull the plug on my dad after two weeks. You don't want to give him time and see what happens you just want me and my mother to sit her and watch you turn off the machine and his breathing go flat when we have another option to keep him on the machine. You may be ready to just pull the plug and clear this hospital room for someone else to use but I'm not,"Clark said getting up from his chair and leaving the hospital room. He just closed his eyes and leaned back on the door as he fought off the urge to break down and blubber right in the middle of the hospital.

Once he found his composure he opened his eyes and turned to leave . . ."Oh my God,"he said as he spotted Lana Lang staring straight back at him. "I'm back,"she said as he walked towards her. He wrapped his arms around her tighter than he had ever hugged her before. He just rested his head in her hair memorizing the fruity smell. "How did you know?"Clark asked pulling back from their embrace. "When you missed three call dates, I caved in and called Chloe and she filled me in. I hopped on a plane and got here as fast as I could. I know it's a stupid question but how are you holding up?"Lana asked. "Walk with me,"he said as he led her outside the hospital to a bench.

"Did you see us with those doctors in that room?"Clark asked. Lana nodded. "They were telling us that my dad is gone and that it would be in his best interest to shut off the machine and let him go. They basically called us selfish for keeping him on it,"Clark said staring at the ground. "You're not selfish. You just love your dad and you want him back. You just want to save him. That doesn't make you selfish. What happened when he had the heart attack?"Lana asked. "He was working in the field and it looked like he tried to lift a heavy bag of feed and he just . . . . .collapsed. He wasn't found for over a half an hour, when somebody who was lost was driving to the farm on accident. They called the ambulance. If they wouldn't have gotten lost my dad would have . . . .died . . . .straight away. I guess according to the doctors . . .he's dead anyway,"Clark said as he started to cry. Lana pulled him in and stroked his hair as he cried on his shoulder. Lana silently let tears fall down her cheeks but tried to be strong for Clark. As she held him in her arms and listen to him let himself go with her, her decision became set in stone. Smallville would be seeing a lot more of Lana Lang.


	4. Forcing A Choice

Reality Sinks In-Part Four

Notes: This chapter takes place a few hours after the last chapter ended. That would make this the same day as Lana's return to Smallville. Clark has pulled himself together and then went back to the Mr. Kent's room and sat down with Martha. Here it goes . . .

Lana sat in the corner of Mr. Kent's hospital room just watching Clark stare at his lifeless father next to his bed. Clark rubbed his eyes in exhaustion. His mother noticed and was waiting to say something to Clark. "Clark I wish you would go home and sleep. You haven't slept in days. I'm really worried,"Martha said. "I don't want to leave mom, just in case. We've been over this,"Clark snapped at her. "Clark I'll stay here and you take Lana back to the house and get her settled in. She must be tired from the flight. Plus, you need to be fresh for our meeting with the lawyer tomorrow,"Martha said as she looked to Lana for some help. "Yeah Clark let's go back and get some sleep. Your dad is going to need you tomorrow to be strong for him,"Lana said standing up. Seeing that he was cornered, Clark agreed to go home and sleep. "Call me if anything changes,"Clark said kissing his mother on the cheek and getting one last glance before leaving the room.

Clark felt a little uncomfortable on the drive home and he was trying to figure out why in his head. He had not felt uncomfortable around Lana in the longest time. She had changed so much in the way she dressed and even how she talked had changed because she was being really assertive all the time. "You look amazing. I never got to tell you that. Paris really agrees with you,"Clark said looking from her to the road. "Actually, it doesn't,"Lana said. "What do you mean?"Clark asked a little surprised. "Don't get me wrong Paris is amazing and beautiful, but not being near all the people that I love is an unbearable pain. And that's why I came back to stay,"Lana said. "Are you . . .serious?"Clark asked with his eyes darting from the road back to Lana. "Yes, I'm back for good,"Lana said. "You have no idea how happy that makes me,"Clark said very seriously with no smile appearing on his face.

Clark made up his old room for Lana while she took a shower. When Lana returned clean and happily not smelling like airport, she found Clark sitting on her bed with milk and cookies.

"I know we're not supposed to eat desserts before bed, but I thought you might be a little hungry,"Clark said offering Lana a cookie and a glass of milk. "I won't tell if you don't,"Lana said taking the milk and a cookie. "Lana, can I ask you something?"Clark asked her. "Of course. You can ask me anything,"she said. "Are you just coming back because my dad is how he is and you think that you have to?"Clark asked. Lana took his hand, "Clark I came back because you needed me but I'm staying because I missed you and Chloe too much and this all helped me to realize how much. When I couldn't get a hold of you, I was so worried. If something were to happen to you and I was in Paris, I would never forgive myself. I'm not staying out of pity. I'm staying because as cheesy as it sounds, no place is special to me if you're not there,"Lana said.

"Alright, well if you need anything I'll be in my room. Goodnight,"Clark said standing up and leaning down and kissing her on the cheek. "I'm glad you're back,"he said turning to leave the room.

Lana couldn't sleep at all. She tossed and turned in the dark. She kept having flashbacks of Mr. Kent before she left and the one she saw lying in the hospital bed. Then, she would flashback to Clark before she left and the one she saw come out of that hospital room. Eventually it all became too much and she decided to go downstairs to get a glass of water. As she came down the stairs she saw Clark, sitting in the dark on the couch shirtless with pj bottoms and a pillow in his grip. She walked over and silently sat down next to him. "Couldn't sleep?"she asked. "No, you?"Clark asked. "Not really. I guess it's just all very overwhelming you know. Leaving Smallville one way and returning to place that doesn't feel like . . .home even though it is. We really do need to sleep though. Tomorrow is a big day. Well . . .I guess it's today now but whatever. Come on,"Lana said taking Clark's hand and pulling him towards his bedroom. He climbed underneath the covers and as just as she turned to leave the room his hand caught hers. "Sleep with me tonight,"Clark said patting the other side of the bed with his other hand. Lana didn't even hesitate to lift up the covers and shimmy her way down under the sheets. Clark cuddled up against her back and draped his arm over her and laid his head in next to her hair. For a few seconds Clark felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Of course, the weight returned as he started to feel his pain again and guilt over even feeling good for two seconds. Clark knew that at least whatever he was going to face in the future, he would have Lana by his side. As he calmed down, he slowly drifted off to sleep with that thought in his mind.

Clark awoke up to the loud beeping of his alarm clock. Lana and him were in the same position as they were when they fell asleep. The alarm clock hadn't awoken Lana and Clark hated to wake her because she looked so peaceful, but they had to get ready for the lawyer and his mother to arrive. He sat up and kissed her cheek which caused her to stir. "Hey,"Lana said as Clark came into focus. "It's time to get up that lawyer will be here at about noon,"Clark said as he climbed out of bed. "Okay, I'm up,"she sat sitting up and rubbing her eyes. As she her focused she saw Clark looking through his shirt drawers for something to wear and she couldn't help but focus on his tone chest. "Why don't you go get ready and then I'll make us some coffee and something to eat,"Clark told her. "Okay,"Lana said leaving his room and shutting the door behind her.

The two got dressed and drank a cup of coffee and had toaster waffles before Clark's mother arrived home with the lawyer following close behind her. "I think I'll wait upstairs in your room Clark,"Lana said whispering in his ear. Clark walked up to the lawyer and shook his hand as Lana slipped upstairs to get out of their way. "My name is Stan Benneck and I was entrusted with Jonathon's legal affairs for these type of situations. I have all the documents with me and I'm ready to explain it all to you,"the lawyer said being very professional. "Let's sit down,"Martha said motioning for them to be seated.

"Martha . . .Clark we have a very . . irregular situation here. I know you both were very reluctant to meet with me. I understand you think this is giving up on him, but Jonathon does have his own legal wishes that he wanted to be carried out and you should be aware of them. Jonathon came to me in the winter and got his affairs in order. He made it very clear and signed the documents for Clark to make all his medical decisions if he were to be incapable of doing so himself,"Stan paused. "WHAT? Why would he make Clark do that,"Martha exclaimed. "He thought you both would not understand so he left two personal letters to both of you and told me Clark's letter contained his wishes for Clark to carry out. They aren't legally binding wishes, but he also told me that because he knew that he raised his son with values and morals that no matter what, he would do the right thing,"Stan said just staring at Clark who was in shock. "By medical decisions what do you mean?"Clark said. "Medical decisions pertains to the life support machine, emergency surgeries, medicines to be administered, things like that,"Stan replied. "So let me get this straight. I'm now the one in charge . . .of whether my father lives or dies?"Clark asked. Clark was so overwhelmed in that moment and completely confused. He didn't know what to do. He glanced to his mother who had opened her letter read it and started to cry hysterically. It all became way to much for Clark in that moment. "You should really read the letter son,"Stan said.

Without saying a word, he glared at the attorney and got up from his seat and walked straight out the front door. He got in his truck and before he left he looked up to his bedroom to see his raven haired girlfriend staring out the window at him. He sped off to a place he knew only one person could find him. That one person was the only one he could talk to. The only one he needed to talk to. He was sure and he knew that somehow she would find him.


	5. The Letter

Reality Sinks In-Part Five

Notes: Sorry for the long break, but I forget to post a lot during the summer when I'm really busy. During the year it'll be a lot better and I'll submit more regular. This chapter picks pretty much where we left off. Clark has ran from his home after discovering the news about his father's decision. He's gone somewhere to make sense of it all. Here it goes.

Lana waited for the lawyer to leave before she got in her car and set out to search for Clark. Martha had gone straight to her room after the lawyer left and locked the door. Lana needed to find Clark and find out what happened. She almost had convinced herself to ease drop, but in the end her conscience won that battle and she remained in Clark's room until she heard him slam the door downstairs and watched him drive away. Lana got in her car and started searching every possible place that her boyfriend could be. She went to the cave first and found no Clark. She then went to the school, to Chloe's house, Pete's house, and then to the Talon. All these places had no sign of Clark. As it started to get dark, she got back in her car in front of the Talon and closed her eyes and it just came to her. The last time she felt free was when her and Clark had climbed the tower in Chandler's field. That was where he was. She drove as fast as she could and ran into the field with her flashlight. When she came to the field, she had a wave of relief as she saw his legs dangling from the tower.

Lana startled Clark from his deep thought as he heard her shoes clank as she climbed the ladder. Clark lent her his hand as she pulled herself onto the platform. "It's a very stupid question but, hiding?"Lana asked. Clark only nodded. Lana began to shiver in the night air because she was only wearing a tank top. Clark noticed this and immediately took off his jacket and put around her shoulders. "Thank-you,"Lana said. She noticed Clark was holding a piece of paper in his hand. "It's totally okay if you don't want to talk about it, but what happened downstairs?"She asked. "I thought you would've ease dropped,"Clark said staring off into the field. "The thought crossed my mind believe me, but you guys deserved privacy,"Lana said looking down at the ground that was so far away. The orange light still only barely lit the sky and was being overwhelmed by the purple in the sky. On any other occasion this would be a great spot for a date. "The lawyer . . .said that my dad made me legally responsible for his medical decisions and in this case . . . that means whether to leave the machine on or . . .not,"Clark's said with a weak voice. "Why? Why would he do that?"Lana asked confused. "It's supposed to be in this letter. Along with instructions about what I'm supposed to do. I can't open it,"Clark said. Lana was at a loss for words. This didn't fit. It didn't seem right and she somehow knew that was exactly what Clark was feeling. She knew the doctors were encouraging them to shut the machine that kept Jonathon alive off and she knew they would be in debt for a very long time if he stayed on it. Clark was now the one in control of another life. "Would you do me a favor?"Clark asked. "Anything. I'll do anything for you,"Lana replied holding back the tears. "Read it to me . . .please,"Clark said handing her the envelope. She turned on her flashlight and pointed it to the paper.

She read to him:

Dear Clark,

If you're reading this then I'm laying in a hospital bed and incapable of making whatever choices are going to have to be made about my life. Before I get to my wishes I want you to remember that I love you son and I always will.

Clark let his tears stream down his face while Lana read the letter.

The one personal wish I have for you is that you do not blame yourself for my condition. That is the only way I could ever be disappointed in you. You are the best son a man could ask for and you are gift from God. I cherished everyday I had to get up in the morning and spend it with you and your mother. I have no regrets. Listen to me son. I have no regrets about the decisions I had to make. There wasn't one day that I've regretted you coming to us. I want you to always use your gifts for good and helping people like you always have. Don't change that. I want you to find someone you can spend the rest of your life with and enjoy what I found with your mother. You choose your destiny and what choices you make. Your parents, your friends, and your race cannot choose these decisions for you. I'm sorry that I won't be there for the good times to come. I know there will be many. I want you to know that if you are blessed to be married and have children, I'll be there with you always. I'll watch over you and smile at how my son has made me so proud. I've entrusted you with these critical decisions because I trust you son and I know that you will do what I ask of you because it's how I raised you. I know your mother will not understand and will be adamant about changing your mind or preventing you from making these choices, but with time she will understand. Give her time to understand, no matter what and she'll come to you. This is why I didn't choose her. I know she would sell herself and everything she had to keep me alive in some hospital bed. This is not living son. I lived my life an active man and there's no use prolonging an inevitable outcome. If it comes to pass that I'm not able to live or make these decisions on my own and I'm laying in bed hooked to a machine or something like this I don't want my life to prolonged. If I cannto live on my own and function I don't want to at all. Son, I need you to be strong for me and let me go. Remember always, especially in the happy times. Don't blame yourself or feel guilty for making this decision that I'm asking you to make. If I thought you couldn't handle this I wouldn't have let you. Don't fail me son.. Also, don't take your friends for granted. I want you to promise me that you will protect your secret but you will make yourself happy because life goes to fast. I don't know how long you will exist but I do know you will have a great existence. I want you to always be there for your mother if she will let you. Take care of her for me and remind I will love her forever. Take care son. I love you.

Dad

As Lana set the letter down and wiped her eyes she put her arm around his back. He let himself lean into her shoulder and though she tried to be strong she ended up crying into his t-shirt. Since she had never knew her father, in the past few years Mr. Kent had seemed like the next best thing as someone to look up to. These days any pain that Clark felt, she shared in. Her heart started to ache in that moment and she felt more emptier than she had ever felt. She couldn't imagine how Clark felt. The next 24 hours would be the hardest of his life and possibly her own.


	6. The Right Thing?

Reality Sinks In-Part Six

Notes: This chapter is going to start the morning after the last chapter. Clark and Lana pulled themselves together and slowly climbed down from the Talon in the morning and drove off.

We start with them heading back into town.

Lana followed in her Jeep as Clark parked his truck in front of the closed Talon. Lex had shut it down for the summer because Lana was in Paris and he had interest in a small town coffee shop. Lex couldn't bring himself to get out of their partnership, so he just let it sit there. They both got out of their cars and Lana unlocked the front door.

"A lot of memories in here," Lana said looking around at the same place she left a couple months ago. "Yeah. I almost lost my virginity here to the woman of my dreams, but I was stupid and saw the damn paper on the end table,"Clark said showing so little emotion it almost scared Lana. "Hey, me too. Except, I was stupid and didn't tell the man of my dreams I was leaving, which hurt him . . .a lot. I want him to know how sorry I am,"Lana said sitting down in a booth. "I think he would say it doesn't matter because he loves you so much that nothing could make him forget,"Clark said as his eyes teared up. "Clark, I am sorry you have to make this decision. It's not fair. No matter what you decide . . I'll stand by you,"Lana said getting up and walking to Clark who was standing in the middle of the room. "Lana, I have to do it. For him,"Clark sniffling and his voice cracking up. "I know,"Lana said. "I don't want to do it, but after reading the letter. He told . .he told me to. Why would we he make me do this?" Clark said. Lana wrapped her arms around him. "She's gonna hate me,"Clark said pulling back a little from their hug and letting Lana see the tears streaming down his face. "Who's gonna hate you?"Lana asked confused. "Mom is gonna hate me for doing this,"Clark said. "She won't hate you. Your mother could never hate you,"Lana said. "No. She has been fighting to keep him alive, just like I have. If someone else had been asked to do this, I would hate them. She was so mad when she heard I was the one to control it. She knows what he asked. I know she does. He knew this would break her heart and he asked me to do it anyway,"Clark yelled. Without thinking, Clark took a vase off the counter and threw it at the wall. Hearing it shatter made Lana jump and Clark just froze. "Clark, your father believed that you are strong and could help . . . him to be free. He knew your mom loves him so much, like you do, but that she couldn't do it. She isn't strong enough,"Lana said. "I'm not strong enough,"Clark said. "Clark this is all horrible. You are strong enough. Because I love you I'm going to tell you, you don't have to do this. You can leave him on the machine and no one else will know about the letter. It's pretty locked in that everyone's going to be upset no matter what. I'm not saying what you should decide, but if the doctors are right you'll just spend longer going to the hospital, grieving, and helping you along with your mother go bankrupt. Clark I love your father. This is not something somebody can write a _How To_ book for. This breaks my heart. You have to do what you know is right. Even if you don't want to or it hurts,"Lana said with tears streaming down her face. Clark just stared into her eyes as he realized she was right.

Clark and Lana walked into the hospital right before noon. They found his mother in the waiting room. Clark wanted to avoid her for a little while, until he had talked to his father. Lana waited outside the hospital room while Clark went in, to say his goodbyes.

Clark slowly walked to the bed and his knees collapsed to the floor. He took his dad's hand in his own and just looked at his father. "Dad . . .I'm going to do . .what you said,"he said breathing hard. "I don't know why you would ask me to sign your death certificate. I'm just your son. I've been fighting for you for nothing now. Mom won't understand. Worse then I don't. I know her and how much she loves you. I don't want to do it. Please. . .Please. I'll do anything. I'll trade you places if I don't have to do this. Why did you have to slip away,"he said as he laid his head on his chest and cried. "I love you dad. So much. I'll never forget anything and I've found the one I'll always be with. I wish you could be at our wedding day and graduation. I still need you dad. I'm not finished. I don't know all the answers. . . I won't make you suffer. I hope one day I can see you again,"Clark said as he stood up and leaned down and kissed his father's forehead. Lana watched through the glass as Clark said goodbye to his father and her heart sank in her chest. She watched him lose a piece of himself in that hospital room. He left without looking back. "It's time,"Clark said stone cold. "You stay here I'll be back,"Clark said as he went to the waiting room.

"Clark, thank god. I know what your letter said and you don't need to worry, sweetie. Your dad just didn't want us to have any trouble. I know he didn't mean that he wanted you to kill him. It's just an option for a situation much worse than the one we're dealing with. He can still come back,"Martha said with some enthusiasm. "Mom, let's go outside,"Clark said taking her by the arm. Clark knew how she would react and the last thing he couldn't stand was a big scene. As they got outside and by themselves Clark just said it. "I'm turning off the machine,"Clark said with a stone face. "You're what?"Martha exclaimed. "He specifically told me to turn off the machine if this ever happened and I'm gonna honor his last wish. No matter how much I don't want to and how much it hurts,"Clark said as he held back the emotional outburst that he wanted to have. "You can't be serious. You're actually going to kill your father,"Martha said with disgust on her face. "You think I wanted this. Any of it. I don't have a choice,"Clark said. "You always have a choice. I'll never forgive you for this,"Martha said stone cold. "I'll never forgive myself for this,"Clark said. "If you do this I want you out of my house today. I'm serious don't do it. I'll never speak to you again,"Martha said cold. "I'm sorry mom,"Clark said. "No, no. You can't do this. Please, I'm begging you not to do this. Give him more time. He'll come around. You're supposed to take care of him after everything he did,"Martha begged. "Mom, I have to. I won't be able to look at myself whichever decision I make. Dad is not coming back and he wanted you taken care of and so do I,"Clark explained. "Your father and I didn't open our home and raise you like this. For you to treat us like this. You're no longer my son. You should be in that hospital bed!"She yelled at him and slapped him across the face. He turned away from her and walked back into the hospital. Martha stood there, stunned. She just collapsed onto the grass and sat and cried.

Lana jumped up as she saw him enter. He caught the arm of Dr. Hart walking down the hallway. "I'll sign your paper,"Clark said through gritted teeth. Dr. Hart just nodded and told a nurse to bring Clark the proper form. The nurse handed him the form on a clipboard and he saw the blank he was supposed to sign. Clark picked up the pen and just stared at it for a moment. Then he just did it. He stood up and gave it to the doctor. "Happy?"Clark asked angrily. "I'm so sorry for Jonathon. He was a good man." Clark nodded and turned back to the room. Clark and Lana just stood in silence as they watched the nurse push the machine off and turn the sound off on the heart monitor. They stood their helpless as Jonathon's heart stopped beating and he was officially declared to be dead.


	7. Everybody's Changing

Reality Sinks In-Part Seven

I know the subject I'm writing about now is really sad. It made me sad even writing it. This chapter will take place in the late afternoon on the same day we left off in the last chapter.

Lana started to drive back to the Kent farm after Clark finally wanted to leave the hospital after his father had died. Clark hadn't told her yet about the argument he had with his mother.

"Lana things are gonna have to change now,"Clark said. "What do you mean?"Lana asked confused. "When I told my mom what I was going to do, she pleaded with me. . . .She did exactly what I thought she would do. She made me feel like a . . .like a murderer . .,"Clark said and Lana cut him off right away. "CLARK,"Lana said as she slammed on the brakes and came to a complete stop, "You're not a murderer. You did what you had to do. You did what was right for that situation,"Lana said. "I don't think what I did was right. Lana, I think I'm a murderer and even worse it's one of three people I need the most. And in doing this I've lost my mother as well,"Clark said looking to his lap. "You have not lost your mother. She's still alive and would never abandon you,"Lana said. "You're wrong. She's not going to be back at the house today because I'm supposed to take my stuff and get out,"Clark said.

"Your mother . .would never say that,"Lana said surprised. "Oh yes she would. In fact, she did. That's why when we go to the house I'm going to throw my stuff in boxes and go. Like this day, let alone this week, hasn't been enough,"Clark said throwing his head back onto the headrest. "Where are we going to go Clark?"Lana asked. "I know this is all too much for me to handle anyway and I don't even have time to worry and have anxiety over making you feel uncomfortable so I thought you still own the Talon. We could stay in the apartment. If you don't want me to I can go to Metropolis tomorrow or figure something else out,"Clark said. "No, Clark it's more than okay. Staying with you isn't what concerns me. This is a way we can stay here in Smallville together,"Lana said. "At least for the time being,"Clark said. "What does that mean?"Lana asked. "It means I'm confused and overwhelmed right now and I can't think straight so I'll get back to you on the future. . . . Let's get going. I want to get my stuff and get out."

Lana grabbed all her suitcases and threw them in the car. Clark ran into his room and took his drawers and dumped them into his suitcases. He took anything he needed and left things he could live without like his map of stars and the posters of the Met U football team. As soon as he was done they got in Lana's car and went to the new place.

Clark threw his suitcases on the floor in the apartment and Lana threw her suitcases right next to them. "I'll unpack tomorrow I guess,"Clark said as he laid down on the couch that was too small for him. Lana didn't even give her next move a second thought. Her exact thought was, 'If we can almost lose our virginity up here together we can just sleep in a bed together.' She walked over and took his hand. "Come on,"Lana said pulling on him to get up. Clark got up and followed Lana into the bedroom. "I love you,"Lana said climbing under the sheets. Lana didn't understand why Clark was hesitating to get in bed. "I'll be right back,"he said as he walked to the bathroom.

As he shut the door, he went over and kneeled next to the toilet because he had a strong feeling like he was going to throw up and he did. When he got up and started to walk out he just leaned his back against the door and started to cry. He just slid down the door until he hit the cold tile floor. He covered his face as he began to shake with so many emotions through his body. 'Made of steel? Right,'were the thoughts rolling through his mind.

Lana just laid her head against the headboard as she listened to him cry and break down. She almost was about to go talk to him but she knew there was nothing that she could say to make him feel better or erase the loss of his father and everything that happened that day. After a few minutes Clark came in wiping his eyes and Lana decided to act like she hadn't heard it. "You okay Clark?"Lana asked as Clark slipped into bed and laid on his side with his back facing her no doubt to hide his tears. "Yeah,"Clark said. Lana snuggled up to him and slipped her arm over him and rested her hand on his stomach. "I'll take care of you,"Lana said into his ear as a tear rolled down her cheek. Lana drifted off, but Clark remained awake all night replaying all the horrible images in his head.


	8. We're Gathered Together

I'm so sorry that I haven't posted in awhile. I'll try to make it up to you by posting a bunch this week.

Reality Sinks In-Part Eight

The Funeral

Notes: This is two days later than the last chapter and the day of Jonathon's funeral.

Two days had passed since Jonathon's death. Martha had no idea where Clark was and she had no interest in finding him. As hard as that would be to believe for most that had known her, but every person has there breaking point. The point where they no longer can control how they feel or act because the world is dimmer and the sun doesn't seem to shine the same.

She found it very easy to blame him for the death of Jonathon even though deep down she knew better. Martha knew that admitting that Jonathon would have died anyway was admitting that it was out of her hands already. That he couldn't have been saved more or less.

She even hoped he would not attend the funeral, but she knew he would. Chloe had found out the details about the funeral and passed them on to Clark. Chloe hadn't fully understood all the details about the past three days, but she decided to act now for Clark and ask him questions about it all later when things calmed down.

Clark sat on the couch in the apartment in jeans and a t-shirt, just staring at his hands and daydreaming about happier days. He had done this a lot in the past couple of days and he almost felt like he couldn't control it. Lana walked in the room and saw him doing it again which worried her, but they didn't have time to deal with it at the moment. "Clark, here's your black suit. You need to get dressed so we're not late. The funeral starts in hour and a half and we need to be a little early,"Lana said handing him the suit. Lana was already dressed. She was wearing a black short sleeve dress and had her hair pulled up. It didn't take Clark long to get dressed, so Lana and him had a lot of time to sit on the couch and wait for Chloe and Pete to arrive. They all were going to ride together and sit together to lend moral support.

After a long half an hour silence there was a knock at the door. When Lana opened the door, the blonde reporter was standing in front of her. "Hey Lana,"Chloe said hugging her. "Clark's on the couch. He'll be glad to see you. We just have to wait for Pete and we can leave,"Lana said closing the door. Chloe walked straight for Clark who stood up to hug her. "I'm here for you okay. Anything you need, you just ask. I here and I'm a really good listener,"Chloe said as she pulled back from their tight hug. "Thanks Chloe. I appreciate everything you've done,"Clark said. Just as Clark finished talking their was another knock on the door which was Pete.

"Man, this whole thing sucks and I want you to know I'm here for you. I love ya man,"Pete said as he hugged Clark. "Thanks. Let's get going,"Clark said nodding to Lana. Pete and Chloe really didn't know what to say on the ride to the funeral. The car was filled with a very uncomfortable silence due to the lack of any other phrases coming into their heads except I'm here for you or is there anything I can do. It was killing Chloe and Pete not knowing what happened at the hospital and why Lana and Clark were now living together.

When they arrived at the funeral home, Lana parked the car and took the key out of the ignition and no one moved. "You guys I appreciate you standing by me. . . .I would really like to keep a low profile and sit in the back somewhere,"Clark's voice as he spoke sounded as if he was recovering from a cold because it was raspy and dry. When they walked inside the funeral home and Clark saw the casket and the large picture of his father to the side everything became real. He suddenly had another feeling that he was gonna have a break down. As Lana noticed this, she immediately took his hand and mouthed, "It's okay. Breathe." They filled up a bench near the back. Clark looked up to the front and saw his mother talking to the reverend while she sat on the first bench. The place had about a hundred people in it and was nearly filled up. When it was about to start Clark felt a tap on his shoulder.

When he turned around he saw the famous bald billionaire. "Clark I'm sorry,"Lex said as Clark stood up and gave him a quick hug. "Thanks for coming,"Clark said conveying his gratitude. They all scooted down and made room for Lex. The reverend came up to them right before the service was set to start. "Excuse me. Are you the son of the deceased?"he asked. "Yeah, I'm Clark Kent,"Clark replied. "May I speak with you?"the reverend asked. "Uh . . .yeah,"Clark said getting up and climbing through Lex to get out of the bench and walk with the reverend to the corner.

"I just want to say I'm so sorry that you lost your father. Now your mother refused to comment on the subject, but I wanted to give you the opportunity to speak or ask someone to speak for your father. I know you're young and that you probably don't want to, but it's always nice if a family member or someone close to the deceased shares their memories. Now I don't want you to feel pressured at all,"the reverend said noticing the change in Clark's appearance at the mention of getting up and speaking. "I'm sorry reverend. I just can't,"Clark said regaing his posture and walking back to his seat.

"What did he want?"Lana asked him in a whisper. "He wanted me to speak,"Clark whispered back in her ear. "Did you say yes?"she asked still whispering. Clark just shook his head no. All the attention was directed to the front of the room as the reverend began the services.

"We are all here today to honor the memory of Jonathon Kent a beloved husband and father. Jonathon is survived by his wife Martha and son Clark. Jonathon was a beloved man in the Smallville community who stood for compassion, hard work, and good morals. Jonathon was raised in Smallville and took over his father's farm when he passed on and continued to run it until his death. I'd now like to call up Martha Kent to say a few words,"the reverend said. Clark was stunned that his mother was actually going to speak.

"I have loved Jonathon for many years and will continue to love him throughout the remainder of my life. Jonathon gave everything he had to better his family and their existence,"she paused and wiped a tear from her eye. "He always told me that I thought I was too smart for the simpleness of farm life which was not true. I loved working hard and creating a family with him. When we found out I couldn't have children, it broke both our hearts because that was something we both wanted more than anything. When we found Clark and adopted him, a void in our life was filled and Jonathon finally had a son to teach everything he knew to. This is exactly what he tried to do for Clark. When there was a miracle a couple years back and I became pregnant with a child of our own, we were both overjoyed to finally have our chance to go through the whole process. When certain events left me with a miscarriage, we both were filled with an overwhelming amount of guilt and pain that we knew would follow us around until we met our end. The death of my husband and partner is no different,"Martha said as she started to look directly at Clark who had a tear stained face.

"I will have an overwhelming feeling of guilt over the death of my husband and an overwhelming pain and this is something I have to learn to live with. Jonathon loved Smallville and loved all of his friends and neighbors. I beg you all to pray that he finds a safe journey to heaven. Jonathon was a good man and I will miss him. Life will never be full until it's time to meet him in heaven,"Martha said wiping her tears from her face and taking her seat.

When the service was over, it was time to pass by the open casket for last respects. As the row of them started to go up there with Clark leading them, Clark turned and grabbed Lana's hand and pulled her up to walk next to him. Lana put her arm around his back and prepared herself as they reached the casket which held Mr. Kent. Mr. Kent was dressed in a black suit and tie and looked completely different than he used to. Lana just glanced to Clark who looked like he had the wind knocked out of him. He reached into his jacket pocket and took out a picture that had his father, mother, and himself looking like the happiest people alive. He glanced at it for a moment before laying it next to his dead body. "I love you dad,"Clark said as the tears streamed down his face. He took one last look and nodded at Lana that he needed to leave and they walked out.

When they got out of the funeral home, Lana quickly noticed the glistening tears and tried to save him his dignity before Pete and Chloe came out by wiping his tears away. When they all reached the car, Clark was the first to break the silence. "Would you mind if we just went back to the Talon?"Clark asked Lana. "Of course not,"she replied. They went back and Lana made them all cappuccinos to drink. Clark didn't drink his which made Lana worry. "I'm actually kind of tired. I think I'll just go to bed,"Clark said getting up from the table.

"Clark what happened at the hospital,"Chloe exploded as she stood up. She finally let her desire for the truth overcome her. "Do you think this is all some big story Chloe? Do you think my misery is some big climactic plot? Not everything is A DAMN HEADLINE,"Clark yelled as he picked up a chair and threw it against the wall which broke off it's legs. He then ran upstairs, leaving Chloe crying, Lana's jaw on the floor because she was stunned, and Pete speechless. "I didn't mean to . . .do that. It just came out. Oh God I'm horrible,"Chloe said wiping her eyes. "No, it's okay. He's hurting. I'm sure he'll feel bad about this later. Why don't you guys go home and I'll call you when he's feeling a little better. It's been a long day and I know he appreciated you guys coming,"Lana said in kind of wife like way. Pete took the hint quick and honestly was relieved that he wasn't going to be the one to get in all the emotional stuff which was hard for him. He stood up and gave Lana a hug and told her the courtesy line, "If there's anything I can do," and left. Chloe took just a second longer. "Tell him I'm sorry,"Chloe said hugging her. "I will Chloe. Don't feel bad. This wasn't your fault. It was a break down waiting to happen,"Lana said trying to make her feel better. They said goodbye and Chloe exited.

Lana opened the door to find Clark in bed with a shirt and some sweat pants on. She somehow knew that talking was the last thing he wanted to do, so she grabbed her pajamas and went to the bathroom to change. When she came back out she saw him still awake staring at the ceiling. She quietly got into bed and stayed on her side, laid on her back, and stared at the ceiling with him. Without warning he just slipped his hand on top of hers. They laid silent, hand in hand, staring at the ceiling.


End file.
